Costa Rica's Judicial Investigation Police (OIJ) confiscated roughly 400-kilos of cocaine and $1.5 million at a private airstrip on the Hilton family-owned Rancho Horizonte in the country's northern Cañas region. Three Nicaraguans were among the arrested, (realistically) because of leftover Iran-Contra bullshit.

Pulitzer prize-winner Gary Webb is arguably the reason we know anything about CIA complicity in the crack-cocaine epidemic of the 1980s—collateral damage of the Reagan administration's desire to fund the Contras despite three Congressional amendments forbidding them. Even more admirably, Webb did not have a goatee.

Vladimir Putin is a man. He has budding friendships with famous actors Gérard Depardieu and Mickey Rourke—and a deep bond with action hero Steven Seagal. Seagal took to the stage at a pro-Russian concert in Crimea, not long ago. Rest assured, when sanctions fail, the West will hit Putin here, where it hurts most.

Terrible animated sitcom The Family Guy aired a rerun, centered around Robin Williams, just moments before the public learned of Williams’ tragic suicide. Some of Earth’s 7 billion sentient humans suspected this meant that he had been sacrificed by the elite deviants of the Bavarian Illuminati.

After a series of wild outbursts and derivative art stunts, former Disney property Shia LaBeouf is "voluntarily seeking treatment for alcohol addiction." But what precipitated LaBeouf's unraveling? Was it a systemic failure in his MK-ULTRA Monarch slave conditioning? Unblock your Ajna chakra and examine the facts.