It seems like every take on Beyonce’s sixth studio album, Lemonade, is just a little bit hotter than the last. Which means that every take probably makes you just a little bit angrier than the last. And apparently, that’s exactly what the CIA wants.

Beyoncé's 2011 pregnancy was more than just the buildup to the birth of Blue Ivy—it was also a gestation period for crazed baby-conspiracy theorists. Why did one of the world's foremost experts in self-promotion release only a few arty pictures of her stomach to document the pregnancy? How did she manage to give birth in a Manhattan hospital without any information about the event itself leaking from a third party? And what was with her stomach collapsing during that one TV appearance? All good mysteries, easily solved by the chaise-lounge conspiracy theorist: Duh. Beyoncé was never pregnant.